Corresponding with the Heterosexuals

Hi, enthused teacher or bewildered student
or concerned parent!
Thank you for emailing out of the blue or
as the French say, out of the bleu.
To answer your urgent & original question,
I am not inspired, ever.
I write just so you will assign/do/
help with—while disapproving of—
all this homework
about me
& grow up
or finally be well-adjusted, capable
of taking out the recycling
on a semi-regular basis while talking to your
semi-handsome neighbor
who’s sitting outside. Ah, the fresh air
becoming hotter & oranger by the minute.
Oh, that’s not a gay thing,
sorry, that’s a planet in deep
doo-doo thing.
To answer your less urgent & unoriginal question, yes.
Your dreams will die & so
will you. But if you’re lucky, you’ll go first.
Meanwhile, someone in Switzerland
is sending their very first email,
now isn’t that a sight for sore eyes. Oh,
a cliché! Quick, let’s revise. Now isn’t that
a kite for sore lives. Much better, n’est-ce pas? Sorry,
I know French
is filth & the gayest of langues. & now
I must go feed my second pug, Symposium.
Yup, that’s a Plato thing.
Oui, that’s a gay thing,
so sorry. Désolé. Je suis vraiment,
vachement désolé.

Quintessence: the Soul (If It Exists)

Ajar.

Aloft. Afar, afoot. Ashore,

    atop. Aflutter,

ajar, sometimes a lot.

    Then amuck,

    adrift. Afire.

Awryly aflame. Asunder,

    afucked. & closed

up, or is it down. Sometimes

    for a year,

    years. Then

afloat, aloft, ajarred afresh.

    Anewer aglow.

Astride atrue, across aflew,

    awhoevenknew:

    something in you

so never closed, forever fucking  

    abloom, in fact,

even while amiss, adoom.

    Unasleep, even

    amidst the dullest

miseries. Who knew—this life,

    this alive. Agog,

agod. Awash with vowel & you,

    committed to

    comma &

not yet, or sure, period, but then

    right away up

to go alltheway down. To stumble

    allaround for a

   

    letter, another.

recipe for courage with a side of hot

increase your daily chapstick application by fifteen

hundred percent.

                            practice your kinkiest sex

on your frown-frumpiest days.

retreat for at least an hour every night  

to be with your butt-soft, ass-tough poems.

apply ever more of your heart

to your mouth—

                                 but don’t forget speaking

is only one form of loving.

if one cat sweater doesn’t suffice, don

on top of it another, larger,

sweaterier cat sweater.

remember that a synonym for your heart

is total babe.

remember that the moon shares

             that synonym.

wonder aloud on a park bench in a busy park,

is this poem too moony,

too self-helpy?

                                      accept help

beyond yourself. admit you were wrong

about how good the burgers were at that one place,

they only tasted that good to you

because you were utterly

                                         magnificently stoned.

say the word “vestibule”

five times fast.  

for a week, say to everyone you meet, yes i now

             spell my name “chanel,”

             no it’s still pronounced “chen,”

                        yeah if you don’t get that, i hate you.

listen to the pomegranate

on the kitchen counter say, you think you know

             what a fruit is. you haven’t the foggiest!

become alive

enough to live

your pomegranate faggotries.

             understand that your slutty love for words

isn’t always a lovely sluttiness

for truth. recognize that sometimes

                                         & sometimes often

another synonym for your heart

is undeniable asshole

              —though undenying this is only the first step.

store your chapsticks well.

say lolz

ever so slowly. be not

only a generous lover

             but also a generous love.

                                       know

but don’t dwell on the mountainous

fact that there are just slightly

over four hundred

                                  thousand steps.

know, in the depths

of total babe, that you will, some

                            very december days, be poemless

                            & even sweaterless,

but never will you be kinkless.

John Doe
Poet, Independent Writer
IN CONVERSATION WITH
Chen Chen