It was a mistake to think pain connected us.
We met in a dark cycle. Venus in Leo.

I should have known in the end all you’d want is innocence.
The girl you chose has little armor, little hurt.

I saw a snake give birth to ash when you turned away.
I was trying to teach you something. You think you know

but you do not know about me. Are you listening?
I am the widowmaker, like my father said. So soft and

open, bugs go in and out like I’m a spirit, and I am.
But I am also bleeding into the new year. In the end

I am so porous anything that wants to get in
will make a home. Grief, pain, the worm of nothingness

boring more nothing inside of my softness. You’ll want me
when I’m so open anyone can have me.

I’ll be royalty by then. A reflection
of the people who love me, the people who loathe me.
This grief of beetles a crown I wear.
This sad of crabs, my jewels.